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Saturday, 1 April 2017

Sub sighting off Ainsdale beach creates concern

Local sea fisherman, Berthold Konrad, thought he’d had one too many beers this morning.

While fishing on the beach with his wife Ingmar, the couple spotted what looked like a large submarine.

Berthold explained to OTS News.

“I was right taken aback when this great black thing popped up near the rig and was heading like the clappers towards the pier. We were so shocked that Ingmar dropped the lugworms.”

Above: Concerns raised for potential structural damage to Southport Pier. 

Mr Conrad naturally phoned for help. He stated... 

“This Council lad on the other end of the phone said it was nothing to worry about and was likely to be something to do with Southport twinning towns with Moscow to attract more tourism.”

An Environment Agency spokesmen rushed to the scene to investigate but his van, which was well overdue for an oil change and new spark plugs, got stuck in the mud by the pier.

Later, officials in Belova strenuously denied any unauthorised military incursions into Sefton waters. 

Colonel Ivan Tipoff  (Main Intelligence Agency) stated: “It’s not one of ours mate, but I bet that Trump guy knows something about it.”

Bootle Council's  CEO, Margaret Carney, was unavailable for comment. 

Pat Regan © 

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